Monday, April 30, 2012

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Exams are just around the corner and today was much too pretty to spend inside with my face crammed in books. So, Bobbigail and I took some pictures for her fashion blog and ate some monstrous cupcakes in Northport. Other than a taking a nasty fall into a gutter…today was a pretty glorious day. 








A biology exam, painting clean-up, an unfinished birding journal, and the search for a dress and hat for the Kentucky Derby will keep me more than occupied this next week. After Derby, an Ingrid Michaelson concert with Mary Beth and Amy. Then, home sweet home for a few days. A week of cooking bruschetta for my mom, kayaking with my older brother, mini-dates with my younger brother, and intense visiting time with the rest of my friends and family. 

Friday, April 27, 2012

On this day last year, tornados were making their way through Tuscaloosa, Alabama and the surrounding areas. Some cities were almost wiped out completely, like Phil Campbell. Some actually were wiped out completely. Others were affected in only certain areas. Across Alabama, more than 250 lives were lost and hundreds were left homeless. For so many people, life would never be the same.

I was one of the lucky ones. I didn't lose any family or friends. I didn't have to seek trauma counseling. I didn't have any property damage. But, the experience that I had with the Tuscaloosa tornado is something that I will never forget.

Wednesday, April 27th 2011
      I had an interview that morning that went decently well and then went to my friend (my current roommate) Abbey's dorm across campus. We decided that it would be more fun if we spent the predicted bad weather together and that studying for exams would be more fun with a pal. When I got to her dorm, we gathered up our study materials and a bag of left over Easter candy and headed up to the second floor to a study room where we jammed out to Celine Dion and took occasional study breaks. During one of Celine's quieter songs, we heard an RA walking up and down the halls knocking on doors and informing people of a tornado warning and that telling everyone that they needed to take shelter in the hallways of the first floor. Like any careless, teenage human, we looked out the windows for any signs of bad weather, ignored him, and went back into the steamy study room.

      About ten minutes later, we saw people leaving their rooms to go to the first floor. Reluctantly, we followed. We set up camp in the first floor hallway with our laptops and Easter candy, our backs to the wall. More people flooded in and set up camps similar to ours. Questions were being asked and answers weren't being given. No one really knew what was going on. As time passed, some people got up and went to look out windows and doors and others went back to their rooms. Suddenly, the sound of footsteps running through the hall above could be heard down the hall. People began pouring through the doors and cramming into open spots along the walls. People who went into their dorms came back out and people moved away from doors and windows. One of the boys who rushed through the door said that he was watching the weather and saw that the tornado was headed for campus. Tension filled the hall ways and the questions became more frequent. The boy sitting in front of me and Abbey was receiving text messages from his sister saying that the mall had been destroyed- but he "didn't know for sure." There weren't any facts. Cell phone service was patchy. Internet was out. Cable was out now, too.

      Then, the power went out. Abbey leaned her head onto my shoulder and squeezed my hand. We held hands and told each other reassuring things that we weren't actually sure of. We mentioned our friend Tess who was going to Birmingham that day and how we hoped that she didn't actually go. (We found out later that she stayed in Tuscaloosa). The back-up lights came on and we all sat quietly in the dimly lit hallways and hoped for the best. When we heard that it was safe to leave, everyone dispersed. The power was out and questions still didn't have answers. From where we were, everything looked fine. The sky was a strange shade of grayish-blue and the temperature was muggy and warm but had the slightest chill to it. We heard that Lakeside Dining was open but running on back-up generators and running out of food fast. Lakeside was lit with the same greenish-gray back-up lights and serving strange foods that they usually didn't serve. At some point, we met up with our friend Robert and internet came back for a few minutes. Facebook was flooded with pictures and videos of a tornado less than a mile away from campus. The tornado was massive. There were pictures of cars in trees, leveled houses, people wandering through the streets, and others that we didn't have the stomach to look at at the time. After hearing that the Recreation Center was being used as a shelter, we went and volunteered.

      Arriving at the Rec Center made reality set in. Bloody men pushing shopping carts filled with dogs and t-shirts, a girl covered in dirt with her head and eye bandaged, a Hispanic family standing to the side with blank faces, babies crying, elderly women talking about how they walked two miles, and children standing barefoot and terrified. It looked like a contemporary war movie. There was a room in the back where people were already bringing donated clothes and toiletries in. A table was set up with snacks, fruit, cokes, and waters. Robert, Abbey, and I signed in at the volunteer desk and were all given jobs. Our first assignment was to lead people into a gym where cots and mattresses were placed against the walls and take their names, someone we could contact, and their medical needs. 

      Inside the Rec, it was too busy to think. You could hear people telling stories and asking questions but no one really knew what to say. After most of the people had been tended to, Abbey and some other students threw their money together and bought groceries and toiletries for people in the Rec that needed them. Robert and I worked at a table in the front of the Rec and asked people to sign in and out. We continued asking people their names, where they previously lived, a contact, and their medical needs. I can't forget what it felt like to work at that table. Seeing college students look at me with their faces drained of all color as I asked them where they previously stayed, or what their Student Identification Number was. Most people who came through couldn't remember or couldn't write it themselves because their hands were shaking too much. Students, teachers, families, men, and women poured in. Most people who were not students were being relocated to another place in town. In between people, Robert and I had small conversations about how "crazy" it was, and how we couldn't believe it.

      Not only was the table used for checking people in and out, it was also used for people to find people that were missing. People would come in searching for someone and we would check the names on the list. Most of the time, the names wouldn't be there and we would tell them about another list at another desk. Sometimes, they would find the name and leave the Rec with their friend and a sense of peace. Other times, the name wasn't there. One of the memories that stuck with me the most was a woman who was trying to find her son. She lived two-three hours away from Tuscaloosa and was on the phone with him when the roof of his house was ripped off. The call was lost and she had not talked to him since. She drove all the way to Tuscaloosa, through the damage to try to find her son.  I told her to check the lists, showed her the other list, and told her to walk around and see if she can find him. She circled around several times and ended up back up at the front by our table, crying. I asked her what he looked like and she told me that he was, "very tall, athletic, extremely hard to miss, with blonde hair and blue eyes…"In the middle of her description of him, she paused and looked straight ahead and cried harder. That was when a blonde boy about 6'4, grabbed her in his arms. They stood by the table and sobbed uncontrollably, not letting go of each other. After they left, I couldn't shake that image from my head.

      Other stories planted themselves in my memories as the night went on.  A group of male students were walking to the Rec Center when they saw a woman crying and looking frantically for her baby. She asked them to help her and they immediately started tearing through rubble and debris. One of the boys found the baby's body on the side of the road. Even after leaving the Rec, I heard stories that would stay with me forever. Like a boy in Phil Campbell who was in his house during the tornado but didn't have anywhere safe to go. He was walking through his house trying to thing of somewhere logical to take shelter when he had the feeling that he should just sit on the living room couch. After the storm passed, his entire house was gone except for the couch with him seated on it. A girl who was at the library and about to leave when her teacher begged her to stay because it wasn't safe to leave. The girl put up a fight but decided to stay. After the storm, she arrived at her house to find it destroyed. A toddler found alive in a drink-cooler by firemen. When they asked him what made him decide to get in there, he told them about an angelic-like figure.

      After leaving the Rec with a new take on life, I got a call from my worried, older brother. I still had not talked to my mom or dad since I rarely had cell phone service, but I assumed that they knew I was okay.  (I later found out that they were worried sick). I slept at Abbey's that night so that I wouldn't have to sleep in a power-less Tutwiler, "Fourteen Floors of Freshman Whores" by myself.

Thursday, April 28th 2011
      The next day Robert, Abbey, and I went to the Rec to see if they needed our help. Later that day, Abbey and I joined up with some of her former sorority sisters and passed out water to people working in their yards. We came across a man who found a girl's body in a field, the girl turned out to be Carson Tinker's girlfriend. After we ran out of water, we took some groceries to the home of a woman who worked for the University. Running on adrenaline and Burger King, we felt like we could do anything.

      At some point during that day, we found out that our exams had been canceled and graduation was moved to August. My freshman year was over and it had a terrible ending. Tuscaloosa wanted to get as many people out of the city as possible and immediately. Normally, we would have weeks to pack and a couple of days to move out. But instead, we had no time at all. If we waited too late, gas would be sold out and traffic would be too heavy. If we waited on our parents to drive to Tuscaloosa to help us pack, it would take twice as long. We had no choice but to pack everything and move out within twenty-four hours. So, Abbey and her cousin Daniel helped me move everything out of my dorm and pack it into my car. Tutwiler is a building of fourteen floors that houses 966 freshman girls. Since the power was out all over town, the only light that we had to work with was one mini flashlight, one emergency light stick, the light of the moon, and two cellphone lights. Somehow, by the hand of God, we were able to take the entire contents of my dorm room down 14 flights of stairs in complete darkness. After seven trips up and seven trips down, we were able to fit everything into my Ford Taurus. The only free space was about seven inches for me to use my rear-view mirror. I don't know how it was possible. It was a miracle. I am eternally in Daniel's debt. 

      And as for Abbey, she was a trooper through the whole thing. Letting me stay with her for almost 72 hours, letting me borrow her clothes, AND helping me move out. After everything was crammed into my car, we went to Zaxby's and ate in a state of delirium. Later that night, we took half-showers in cold water and fell asleep almost instantly.

Friday, April 29th 2011
      The next morning, we packed everything from Abbey's dorm room into her car and threw away things that wouldn't fit. Still running on adrenaline and now Zaxby's and Easter candy, we couldn't feel a thing. Before getting into our cars, Abbey and I said our goodbyes and expressed our appreciation for each other. We reminisced about the not-so-terrible moments of the past three days and talked of greasy hair, basketball players, soldier videos, and Celine songs. We had spent almost 72 hours together so needless to say, it was a sad goodbye.

      A little over three hours later, I was walking into my dad's house and melting into his arms.

.  .  .  

My experience with the tornados was one of the more fortunate ones, but also one that I would never wish on anyone. To see that type of heartache all around you is something that is life changing. But seeing the way that people responded to the tragedy reinforced my belief that people are loving, kind, and compassionate. 
                             
Photo courtesy of Daniel Roth


Sunday, April 22, 2012

Earth Day 2012

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Happy Earth Day, earthlings!
Plant a flower, water a plant, pick up some litter, take a shorter shower, bike instead of drive, make a resolution to start recycling, or just soak up the free Vitamin D that is right outside your door.
Do something to increase awareness about the importance of keeping the planet healthy. 
Or, take a look at some places worth visiting and possibly plan a trip!
Such as, Glass Beach…an example of Mother Earth taking the carelessness of humans and making it into something beautiful.
Green Lake in Austria.
The phenomenal Aurora Borealis.





Wednesday, April 18, 2012




From the Sketching Backpacker Tumblr.
Drawings using pressed leaves.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012


And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair.
-Kahlil Gibran


Sunday, April 15, 2012

Rocky Horror Picture Show
Coraline
 
Sweeney Todd

Pulp Fiction

Star Wars
The Edge of Love
 
Titanic
 
The Darjeeling Limited
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind




I like written confessions of feelings.



I was satisfied with haiku until I met you, 
now I want a Russian novel, 
a fifty-page description of you sleeping.

D. Young.





This is probably the strangest post I've ever written.

Tomorrow… I am going to buy a new fish, cucumbers, a watermelon, and some chai tea. 
When I say "buy a new fish" it sounds like I am replacing my old one as if it didn't even matter.  But that is not the case. Personally, I tend to get very attached to any fish that I keep as a pet. So, when they decide that they want to leave this planet and go to the vast sea in the sky… it hurts a bit.
Fish interest me. I'm allergic to cats so… I'm not one of those girls that have cat blogs, cat tumblrs, cat instagram pictures, or one that jokes about being a cat lady. No. When I'm old.. I will have a tropical aquarium and a dog.  I'll sit in my rocking chair with a sweater, a cup of tea, my dog curled up next to me, and a large, mesmerizing aquarium. Also, my husband will be in a sweater and together, we will doze off while watching Wheel of Fortune and our favorite movies.
Cat lady? Oh, no no no. I'll be a Fish Lady.


Thursday, April 12, 2012

"If still there’s a song deep in this marrow, who lets you draw that last shivering arrow? 
What kind of smarting loon believes that he can shoot the moon? Calm these frailing nerves, they ask to be preserved. I was ashamed and mute fumbling around for my parachute. Then gliding through the rain not a drop could leave its stain, and the world drifting farther away."
The Low Anthem



"If it's the beaches' sands you want then you will have them. If it's the mountains' bending rivers then you will have them. If it's the wish to run away then I will grant it."
The Avett Brothers



"Someone's alone, fell asleep on the phone waiting like a dog for a bone. And how can it be that a fish in the sea can feel like it's completely alone? The world may never know."
Dr. Dog




"Being alone it can be quite romantic like Jacques Cousteau underneath the atlantic. A fantastic voyage to parts unknown. Going to depths where the sun's never shone and I fascinate myself when I'm alone. I'm rambling on rather self consciously while I'm stirring these condiments into my tea and I think I'm so lame.  I bet I think this song's about me. Don't I,  don't I, don't I?"
Andrew Bird


"She runs thru the valley of Death and of Sleeping. She laughs as she dances. Her feet wake the flowers. She comes a now running thru our gloomy town. Yes, Jade is the Girl of the hour. We can't help but follow. She’s Buddha. Just watch her. She moves like an old gypsy woman but swears she’s a girl and all that she asks, we’ll allow her. For Jade is the girl of the hour."
Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros


"Oh, you are the roots that sleep beneath my feet and hold the earth in place."
Bright Eyes


"I'd set my course for land, but you well understand it takes a steady hand to navigate adulterous waters. The propeller's spinning blades held acquaintance with the waves as there's mistakes I've made no rowing could outrun. The cloth blowing on the mast like to say I've got no past but I'm nonetheless the librarian and secretary's son. With tarnish on my brass and mildew on my glass, I'd never want someone so crass as to want someone like me. But a few leagues off the shore, I bit a flashing lure and I assure you, it was not what I expected it to be! I still taste its kiss, that dull hook in my lip is a memory as useless as a rod without a reel. To an anchor ever-dropped, seasick yet still docked. Captain spotted napping with his first mate at the wheel, floating forgetfully along, with no need to be strong.
We keep our confessions long and when we pray we keep it short
I drank a thimble full of fire and I'm not ever coming back. Oh, my God."
mewithoutYou


"So take it as a song or a lesson to learn and sometime soon be better than you were. If you say you're gonna go, then be careful and watch how you treat every living soul. My eyes can't look at you any other way, any other way, any other way."
Band of Horses


"Won't you dance me to the end of love?"
The Civil Wars


"If you don't believe in fantasy then don't believe in fantasy, but
do you not believe in fantasy because it gets you down? If you don't believe it's raining I won't tell you that it's raining, but do you not believe it's raining just because it gets you down? If you don't believe in happiness then don't believe in happiness, but if you don't believe in happiness then man you must be down. If you don't believe you're dying I won't tell you that you're dying, but do you not believe you're dying just because it gets you down?"
Animal Collective



"A year from now we'll all be gone. All our friends will move away. And they're goin' to better places, but our friends will be gone away. Nothin' is as it has been and I miss your face like hell. And I guess it's just as well, but I miss your face like hell. Been talkin' 'bout the way things change and my family lives in a different state. If you don't know what to make of this, then we will not relate. So, if you don't know what to make of this, then we will not relate. Rivers and roads. Rivers and roads. Rivers 'til I meet you."
The Head and the Heart

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

"Behind every good man there is a woman, and that woman was Martha Washington, man, and everyday George would come home, she would have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man, when he come in the door, man, she was a hip, hip, hip lady, man."

"So we drove on toward death through the cooling twilight."



Thursday, April 5, 2012



If
By: Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream---and not make dreams your master;
If you can think---and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings---nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And---which is more---you'll be a Man, my son!